"Holy" is the fifth episode of the second series. It was first broadcast on 29 October 1992. Richie and Eddie's Christmas celebrations go awry when a baby boy is left on their doorstep.
In the early hours of Christmas Day, Richie (disguised as Santa Claus) barges into Eddie's room as he is sleeping. He deposits a large stocking for himself in the corner of the room, followed by a small white sock for Eddie. He then proceeds to have a glass of sherry left on the side. The bottle however is part of a trap laid by Eddie, which when triggered wakes Eddie and tangles Richie in a noose. Not content with being rumbled, Richie insists he is Santa and demands to be cut down, and legs it out of the room complaining of a broken leg.
Moments later Richie comes back into the room wearing his pyjamas and rejoices at the sight of the presents in the corner of the room. He then forces Eddie to endure the tedious unwrapping process, revealing that Richie has wrapped up the ingredients for a Christmas lunch.
The action then moves to the kitchen, where both are milling around trying to sort out lunch. Richie accidentally chops his finger off with a meat cleaver, resulting in a bout of violent finger reattachment with Eddie's help. A few hours later, Richie has changed into his best, and welcomes Spudgun and Dave Hedgehog over the threshold as guests. Lunch turns out to be a disaster, so they move on to the pudding, which ends up being equally as catastrophic. The boys then resign themselves to playing charades and watching TV for the rest of the day, but are interrupted by the doorbell. Richie finds a baby boy in a crib on the doorstep, and convinces himself that he is the Son of God.
Mr Harrison then bursts in demanding they give his grandson Johnnie back; he left him on their doorstep because he wanted to watch Goldfinger in peace on the television. Johnnie's mother Valerie soon wanders in to collect him, finally asking Richie and Eddie whether they mind if she gives Johnnie a quick breastfeed, which they happily agree to, exclaiming "Merry Bloody Christmas!"
Steven O'Donnell as Spudgun
Christopher Ryan as Dave Hedgehog
Roger Sloman as Mr Harrison
Charlie Biddle as Johnnie Bates
Tina Foley as Valerie Bates
- The third of five appearances by Spudgun and Dave Hedgehog, and the second and final appearance of Mr Harrison.
- After the conclusion of the first scene, Eddie comments that it's 7 o'clock, but only minutes later in the same scene Richie notes that it is half-past 8.